If you and your spouse are leaning towards a collaborative divorce, it is important to remember that the amount of effort you put into the process ultimately dictates the outcome. Though you both may have different reasons for wanting to pursue this type of separation, it is imperative for you to work with your divorce counsel and carefully consider everything your partner brings to the table during the negotiations.
Entering into a collaborative divorce does not mean that everything will be smooth sailing. Issues can still arise that challenge you and your partner’s resolve and efforts to work things out amicably. Some concerns may even cause negative feelings and angry behaviors to come up and possibly stall things. However, if you and your partner practice mutual respect and good communication, you may benefit from the advantages of a collaborative divorce by keeping these two points in mind.
- Maintain control over the outcome
Many people assume that the dissolution of a marriage must involve a hectic court battle with numerous hearings, only to get an unfair outcome. Unlike the litigation process, collaboration gives you and your spouse the power to maintain control over what happens. You do not have to rely on the mercy of a judge to determine an appropriate settlement or resolution to your divorce issues.
- Practice patience, self-control and consideration
To preserve the integrity of your collaborative mediation, it is important for you and your partner to ignore any external pressure and influence. You both need to focus on what is best for yourselves and your children. This includes not ignoring your own self-interests and post-divorce needs. Do not feel afraid to ask for what you want and need out of the negotiations. Your partner may not be aware of them or feel inclined to make concessions unless you say something or are willing to negotiate a counteroffer.